Nothing Left To Lose
by Nonnihil Scelestus
Summary: There's nothing left to lose for either of them. AU, Kate doesnt die.


Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS or the song "Nothing Left To Lose" By Mat Kearny

**Nothing Left To Lose**

When the news came down that Gibbs had been caught in the blast of bomb aboard a ship, where he was meeting a contact, the whole team went frantic. They knew his chances were slim. They rushed to the hospital, Ducky and Kate in the lead. Kate was almost running, and the doctor shuffled as fast as his shorter legs would carry him. Abby, Tony, and McGee brought up the rear.

A nurse rushed out to stop their advance stating that only family was allowed beyond that point. Kate opened her mouth to speak, but Ducky beat her to it, telling the nurse he was family, that they were family, and that she would find all their names listed as emergency contacts for Agent Gibbs.

Kate tried to not be impatient, but the words to a song played through her mind, and she couldn't help but think the worst.

_Something's in the air tonight_

_The sky's alive with a burning light_

_You can mark my words something's about to break_

She couldn't help but hear them repeat over and over again and she silently prayed it wasn't her heart that was about to shatter. The nurse told them that he was still in surgery and that a doctor would let them know how he was. They waited impatiently for what seemed like hours before the doctor came out to tell them he was being moved from Post-Op to ICU and that he would recover. Visitors would be allowed as soon as he was settled, two at a time. The boys went first, followed by Abby and Ducky. Gibbs had left Kate in charge before, so before she went in, she passed the baton to Tony, and ordered him to investigate without her.

In the months since they had been free of Ari's attentions, she and Gibb's had grown close, closer than the team seemed to realize. They were on the brink of something profound and she didn't want to lose the small amount of ground she'd gained with him. The team agreed and headed out to do their jobs.

Kate walked into his room, but wasn't prepared for how fragile he looked. She'd never seen him look weak or frail. She felt tears prick her eyes. She moved a chair closer to his side and held his hand, unwilling to let go or fall asleep for fear that she would lose him.

_And I found myself in a bitter fight_

_While I held your hand through the darkest night_

_Don't know where you're coming from, but you're coming soon._

Around dawn, Gibbs began to stir. He moved restlessly at first, as though he were seeing terrible images playing like a movie behind his eyes. Kate gripped his hand tight and whispered to him softly, telling him she was there and that he was safe, that he needed to come back to her. Another hour passed before his blue eyes opened and were fully conscious of their surroundings.

"Kate." His voice was rough with pain.

"I'm right here." She answered, still holding his hand.

"Don't leave me." He said before he dropped back into unconsciousness. She stayed with him through the day; giving Ducky the updates the team wanted every few hours. She began to think he wouldn't wake again. The very thought of never seeing his electric blue eyes was more than she could stand. She dozed off around three in the afternoon, her hand still in his.

_To a kid from Oregon by way of California_

_All this is more than I've ever known or seen_

"Kate." He mumbled and when she didn't respond, he opened his eyes and turned to look at her. "Kate." He said again, squeezing her hand. She sat up quickly, her eyes frantic at first, until her gaze settled on him.

"Hey."

"What happened?"

"You were blown up." He looked down at his sheet-covered body questioningly. "All you pieces are there."

"The team?"

"Working, investigating, trying to figure out what happened."

"Hmmm." He was starting to get sleepy again. The world was already hazy just like his memory of the events. Kate was there, though, and that was all that really mattered to him. "I'm glad you're here, Katie. Love you." It came out muffled and slightly slurred, but she understood.

"I love you too, Jethro." She answered, but he was already asleep.

_Come on and we'll sing, like we were free_

_Push the pedal down; watch the world around fly by us_

_Come on and we'll try on last time_

_I'm off the floor one more time to find you_

_And here we go, there's nothing left to choose_

_And here we go there's nothing left to lose._

When he woke next, Kate was asleep in the chair again, and he could feel every ache and pain from being caught in the bomb blast. He shifted and hissed at the pain. He didn't want any more of the drugs because they dulled his mind. He preferred to be alert, even through the pain. He studied Kate. She looked soft and innocent curled into the chair. He loved her. She knew how he felt and returned his feelings. Since Ari had been killed, they'd become close. They spent time away from work. Ari had pushed him into telling her how he felt. He only wished they were free to be completely open. The new director however would never approve, especially since she was one of his many exes. Kate stirred and opened her eyes. She'd felt him watching her, even in her sleep.

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

"Hurts." She nodded and sat up. "Come here." He ordered.

"You know you should use the painkillers if it hurts."

"You're a better drug. Come here" Kate crawled onto the bed next to him, careful to avoid and tubes or injuries and settled in against his side with her head on his shoulder. "Much better. Go back to sleep Katie."

"Jethro, what happens when we go back to work? I don't know if I can stand to see you like this again. I almost lost you."

"I choose you, Kate. There's no other choice. We'll work it out and we'll be together no matter what."

"I love you."

"I love you too. Now go back to sleep."

"Sure." A few minutes later, they were dozing comfortably. That was how Ducky and the nurse found them the next morning. He smiled at the couple and sat in the chair while he waited for them to wake. His thoughts drifted to the first time he'd met Kate on Air Force One. She'd been the perfect compliment to Gibbs. She'd come to work for them after meeting him as well. He knew then that there would never be another woman for Jethro.

Gibbs woke first and noticed Ducky waiting in the chair. He shifted a little, trying not to wake Kate.

"Morning, Duck."

"Good morning, Jethro. How are you feeling?"

"Better. What did you need?"

"I came to check on you. They'll release you tomorrow. We closed the case."

"That's good, Duck."

"Are you sure that you want to go through with this?" Ducky gestured to where Kate was sleeping soundly.

"There's nothing left to lose. She already has my heart."

"So I see. Get some rest. You may be released from the hospital tomorrow, but you haven't been cleared for work."

"Thanks." Ducky nodded and headed out.

"Jethro." Kate whispered.

"Yeah?"

"You have my heart too."

_Come on and we'll sing, like we were free_

_Push the pedal down; watch the world around fly by us_

_Come on and we'll try one last time_

_I'm off the floor one more time to find you_

_And here we go there's nothing left to choose_

_And here we go there's nothing left to lose._


End file.
